We are as beautiful as we think we are...
Going into the New Year 2018, I am, of course, reflective as many of us are. I often examine the things I have overcome, healed though, and changed in my life the previous year. I look ahead with hopes for different experiences and intentions for completion of various goals.
One challenge I have accepted is to look at my insecurity in various situations and learn ways of shifting or changing my insecure reactions or responses. In these moments I am often an introvert and/or have little confidence. For those who do not know this side of me, don't let it surprise you. We all have moments of insecurity, and it's just how we choose to handle it in that moment that changes our lives forever. As I was thinking of this I recalled a brief but very profound moment I had this summer as I observed a woman at a bagel shop. I wrote down my experience immediately into a note on my phone and I'd like to share.
6/16/17
Today I observed a woman, in her late 20's/early 30's, order bagels at a local shop. She had bright, colored blond hair, tied into several braids against her head, with the loose hair at the end curled and pinned in an up-do. She was dressed for casual business, in a black flowing short-sleeve and pin stripped black flowing pants, with sandals. Her make-up was done softly on her face aside from her dark drawn-on brows. She looked around after she ordered; her eyes were friendly, but she seemed to check the room. She wore large gold and jade colored dangling earrings that tapped her shoulders as she moved. She displayed beautiful, feminine, wild tattoos down both arms. She was hard not to notice. Her body seemed strong and fit, no "skinny girl" look about her. She seemed strong within. This observation took about 45 seconds. As she paid for her bagel I over heard the cashier complement her appearance. The woman genuinely responded, with a bit of awkwardness "Oh, you're so sweet, thank you so much. I've had one of those days where I don't feel so great about myself, so thank you, that means a lot." My mouth dropped, metaphorically. She exuded every ounce of confidence, and yet she was now relatable, willing to expose that honest genuine emotion about her insecurity today.This 45 second observation was a beautiful eye-opening experience for me.
One challenge I have accepted is to look at my insecurity in various situations and learn ways of shifting or changing my insecure reactions or responses. In these moments I am often an introvert and/or have little confidence. For those who do not know this side of me, don't let it surprise you. We all have moments of insecurity, and it's just how we choose to handle it in that moment that changes our lives forever. As I was thinking of this I recalled a brief but very profound moment I had this summer as I observed a woman at a bagel shop. I wrote down my experience immediately into a note on my phone and I'd like to share.
6/16/17
Today I observed a woman, in her late 20's/early 30's, order bagels at a local shop. She had bright, colored blond hair, tied into several braids against her head, with the loose hair at the end curled and pinned in an up-do. She was dressed for casual business, in a black flowing short-sleeve and pin stripped black flowing pants, with sandals. Her make-up was done softly on her face aside from her dark drawn-on brows. She looked around after she ordered; her eyes were friendly, but she seemed to check the room. She wore large gold and jade colored dangling earrings that tapped her shoulders as she moved. She displayed beautiful, feminine, wild tattoos down both arms. She was hard not to notice. Her body seemed strong and fit, no "skinny girl" look about her. She seemed strong within. This observation took about 45 seconds. As she paid for her bagel I over heard the cashier complement her appearance. The woman genuinely responded, with a bit of awkwardness "Oh, you're so sweet, thank you so much. I've had one of those days where I don't feel so great about myself, so thank you, that means a lot." My mouth dropped, metaphorically. She exuded every ounce of confidence, and yet she was now relatable, willing to expose that honest genuine emotion about her insecurity today.This 45 second observation was a beautiful eye-opening experience for me.
This woman made an impact in my life and still does not even know it. I have re-read this a handful of times and each time I take away something different. Today I take away that we are as beautiful as we think we are. Feeling insecure and unbeautiful has held me back in many moments. This belief that devalues has held me back from stepping forward into an experience I wanted, or being myself in a group of strangers.
The challenge I present to myself is the same one I will offer you all ... to be more aware of these moments of insecurity. Then to decide, at that moment of awareness, that what I am comparing myself to or the devalue I am giving myself in that moment is in fact bullshit, and holding me back. I challenge myself, and you, to notice the thought, thank it for showing up to remind us of this challenge, and watch it drive by into the distance, then step forward with sass, passion, amusement, and adventure in every step and action!!
Be as beautiful as you truly are!!
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